While there are a handful of advantages Humankind can claim over the rest of the beasts of the Earth, it is the design of our hands that allowed for our unmatchable achievements. Dolphins and ravens may have the smarts, but their flappy extremities are no opposition to our opposable thumbs. Our precise, deft digits can hold and pick and weave and craft. And therefore, it is no wonder that our hands are precious to us. We grasp hands as a symbol of peace. We give our hands in marriage. We shackle the hands of criminals. So, why then is it acceptable to demand the occupation of my hand with whatever trinket you don’t want?
These hands are sacred to me, and therefore, what goes into these hands is mine to decide! Thank you for making me a plate, but the setting for the plate has been made at the table! Set down your burdens and join hands with Mat and Veronique as we tell you exactly where you can put that steaming plate of Being Handed Things!
*Grumbles are specifically off-the-cuff, no research went into this grumble.
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